Part Two of Two: Why Choose FAM
By Red Pen Mama (earthmother’s sister-in-law)

In the first part of this series, I talked a little bit about the “how” of the Fertility Awareness Method (also known as Natural Family Planning). The book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler, MPH, is an in-depth look into FAM, and should be closely read by everyone interested in using the method.

Although FAM provides information about when you are fertile by charting signs of ovulation, it is not just a method for pregnancy achievement or birth control. All women of menstruating age can use FAM to learn about their individual cycles. FAM provides valuable information about what is normal for you and your body, and can be used to make all types of health care or family planning decisions. It can even provide a clear answer to the question, asked by doctors, gynecologists and midwives the world over: “When was your last period?” How often have you guessed the answer to that question? “Oh, I think it was the first week of April, maybe? Or was it late March?” With FAM, you can simply refer to your chart and have an exact date.

A Few Reasons Why You Should Use FAM

1. As a birth control method, FAM is hormone free. If you choose to have intercourse when you are ovulating, you can be sure to “double up” on the barrier method you choose, for example, using both a sponge and a condom.
2. It is easy. As I said last time, it requires commitment to follow, but once you learn how to chart your cycle, it is a piece of cake.
3. It doesn’t take a lot of time. Last article I compared it to brushing your teeth. FAM takes about the same amount of time to follow – maybe two minutes a day, total, less than brushing!
4. It takes the guesswork out of your cycle. Over time, using FAM tells you how long your cycles tend to be, if you ovulate, when you tend to ovulate (Day 11, Day 17, Day 25?), when to expect the start of your period (you can schedule vacations so you don’t have to deal with the hassle of pads and tampons!), and, if there is a problem, you’ll see it right away and have the information you need for your healthcare provider.
5. You will know if you are pregnant. If you have 18 or more high temperatures after your thermal shift, congratulations! You’re going to be a mother. You’ll even know the likely date of conception, another important day for your healthcare giver to know.

Why I Use FAM

The primary reason I use FAM is because I am 36 years old, and the side effects of hormonal methods of birth control grow more dangerous after age 35. I find most barrier methods inconvenient, distasteful, or uncomfortable. But for the record, I also use FAM because I am Catholic. Natural Family Planning is condoned for family planning by the Catholic Church, and that means a lot to me and my faith relationship with God.

When my husband DearDR and I married, we knew we didn’t want to start a family right away. We used condoms, but neither of us liked them because of the lack of sensation – and, as Catholics, we wanted to be stronger in practicing our faith. I had been on the Pill for seven years in my 20s, and now at 30, I didn’t want to start it again. I stumbled onto Taking Charge of Your Fertility, learned the method, and faithfully applied it. We abstained (or did “other stuff”) during my fertile time (only a few days, usually about a week), and enjoyed worry-free intercourse the rest of my cycle.

After a year, we decided to start trying to have a baby. We didn’t have to try long; the first time we had sex near ovulation, we conceived my son, Gabriel. Unfortunately, Gabriel was stillborn at 37 weeks, a heartbreak we will never get over.

Six months after our loss, we were tentatively ready to start trying to have another baby. Three months later, using the signs of ovulation to plan our intercourse, we again conceived. Today we have a healthy and happy little girl, Monkey, who will be three years old in November.

Then, I must admit, FAM took a backseat. I stopped charting altogether. Oh, I would occasionally tell DearDR that I had fertile fluid, and we would abstain (or whatever), but I wasn’t charting or using any birth control (unless you count the “withdrawal” method — and you shouldn’t!). Thus was conceived our sweet Bun, definitely on the early side of our five-year plan. By about a year. (DearDR still doesn’t believe she’s his because no one in his family has ever been that early.)

I am using FAM again. It is a little challenging now as I get early wake-up calls from our 9-month-old daughter. Also, I am still breastfeeding, and that definitely impacts my cycle, usually by delaying ovulation (I have many of days of fertile-quality fluid). But I know what to look for, and DearDR and I know we are not ready for another. If we decide to try to add to the fun, FAM will let us know if we can, and will give us the signs to provide optimal success.

See also:

The Fertility Awareness Method: Not Your Mother’s Rythmn Method

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